Isn’t it funny how pets can resemble kids? We’ve had our little Great Dane, Napoleon, for a month now, and the more time passes, the more he reminds me of my toddler niece.
For instance, both are on their best behavior when they expect a treat. I’ve yet to see Napoleon sit perfectly still with those big wide eyes for any reason other than hoping for a cookie.
They’re also both stubborn. Even when they know they shouldn’t do something, like eating a bone on the sofa instead of the floor, they do it anyway because they want to.
And whenever you’re dressed up nicely, you can bet there will be drool on your clothes. Or, they’ll grab and stretch them. Wearing white becomes a tough decision. Plus, Napoleon loves to eat my hair.
Even the dullest daily tasks become fascinating to them. They follow you everywhere, dancing around your feet and making you dizzy. My parents dealt with this by getting my little sister to follow me around instead, which was super annoying.
While you want the best for them, spoiling them often isn’t the best solution. Like giving them cake batter, which results in an immediate sugar rush – that’s a lesson learned quickly.
They sleep all day but expect your full attention at night. It’s like they’re on a completely different time zone.
Despite all this, they love you unconditionally and think you’re the most amazing person ever. Napoleon’s always happy and ready to cheer me up when I need it.
You never stop worrying about them. It seems crazy, right? I mean, it’s just a dog! But after spending too much time reading online, I worry about Napoleon’s rapid growth and possible health issues. According to Wikipedia, his breed typically lives 6-8 years, while most dogs live much longer. The worry never goes away.
They are experts at manipulation and can produce crocodile tears on demand. Napoleon even starts crying before I pick him up to scold him.
You buy fancy toys, but they end up playing with the packaging. Napoleon’s favorites? A soda bottle and a cheap electric duct tube.
They don’t need as much as you think. Napoleon’s happy with our regular shampoo instead of an expensive tearless dog one. It takes a lot of willpower to ignore all the targeted marketing.
Although they can’t talk, they sure know how to communicate. “Give me more cookies” couldn’t be clearer.
Never leave anything within their reach. After several chewed-up items, our house is now dog-proofed.
Potty training can be tricky. While Napoleon is getting used to the garden grass, sometimes he prefers the bed instead.
They can even look like you. Remember in Disney’s “101 Dalmatians” how they suggest owners and their dogs resemble each other? Same here. Napoleon loves hikes, road trips (we initially brought him home in a motorcycle pannier, but he’s too big for that now), and cuddling in bed.
They can be expensive, too. While not as costly as kids, pet expenses can add up. Napoleon cost $191 to buy and get set up. We’ve added $5 for a leptospirosis shot, $3 for a parvovirus shot (we get these at a cattle shop where it’s cheaper than the vet), and $30 for a second bag of puppy chow, which lasts about a month. We estimate he’ll eat around $70 a month as an adult dog.
Thankfully, we have staff to care for him when we’re away, but if you don’t, you’ll need to factor in the cost of kennels or pet sitters.
